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Ending the year a pathetic mess

January 4, 2009

After my last post where I lamented over the depths of my indolence, it seems I felt the need to sink into even deeper levels of worthlessness. Cut to the day of December 31.

Me @ work–approximately 10:30am: At this point I had taken great care to answer all three of the emails I had received that day. I also took great satisfaction with the one that announced that the office would be closing at 1pm.  Making sure the last few hours of work passed by smoothly,  I got up to make myself another cup of coffee.  Thoughts of late afternoon naps danced in my head. I even thought I might go get that long overdue manicure in the hours of free time I had before NYE party plans commenced. Life is good.

Me @ work — approximately 12:50pm: A light lunch and some office gossip had pushed us to closing time.  Woo, my last 4-day weekend was almost here and with an extra half-day thrown in! Gathering up the iPod and leftovers from the office fridge, a random thought pops into my head: it’s the last day of the year. It’s the last day to claim 2008 charitable donations for one’s ’08 taxes.  Shit. My considerable pile of Goodwill items is still taking up a quarter of my bedroom. Shit! Shittyshiitshit.  I need to get all that crap to Goodwill before they close today!

Me @ home — approximately 3:00pm: I frantically step into the house and head straight to the bedroom, all the while praying Goodwill stays open past four.  Not that Goodwill is far, no no, there is a major donation center and storefront less than a mile from my house. Yes, I am that pathetic (hence the title of this post).  I grab a pad of paper and a pen and start taking inventory of everything heading out of the door for donation. Some  37 t-shirts, 7 small home goods,  10 pieces of outerwear later I have a list and everything bagged.  Four trips back and forth to the car and I am ready to go.   “Please still be open.” I pray.

Me in the car — approximately 4:30pm:
I drive the three-quarters of a mile to the donation center and can spot activity in the parking lot from two stop lights away.  Sigh of relief.  I wait in the line of cars with all of the other procrastinators (I am not the only one! I am, however, the only one driving a shitty car!).  Goodwill is on it, they are prepared for this level of ridiculousness on this day, Dec. 31.  They extract my bags from my car and send me to the next station where I list the items I’ve donated and get a receipt.

Me in the car — approximately 5:10pm:
I am now heading back home. I would have rather run out to go grab some bubbly for the party later, but in my haste to leave the house I forgot my wallet.

Me @ home — approximately 5:15pm: Heavy errands done, I decide I will work out, shower and then take a nap.  My afternoon is not totally gone.  There are still two+ hours before Jen gets here to whisk me away to DC.  I relax. I sweat. I shower. I freak the fuck out when I think, “did I spend all of my flexible savings account money this year?”. Shit.

Me on the laptop — approximately 6:10pm: Fuck! How much do I have left??  After some serious digging — pay stubs, old cashed checks, credit union accounts — I determine there should be about $202 remaining in my USE OR LOSE FSA account. USE OR LOSE! Money down the drain people!  I immediately go to

Me on — approximately 6:30pm: Band-aids. Neosporin. Motrin. Allergy meds. Oooh, a new heating pad.  Blistex. What’s my total? $85.00. Not enough! Ugh!  More allergy meds. More Motrin. How ’bout some cortisone creme? What else can I buy? Augh! I need to spend almost another $100.  Where can I unload big money? Ah, Sephora.  I immediately head to and load up on ridiculously expensive suncreen. My face will thank me?  I hope so.

Me texting Jen — approximately 7:10pm: “Running late, had to spend some $$. Getting ready now. Think maybe 8pm.”

Me finally ready to go out and party — approximately 8:25pm: Nap? no. Manicure? no. Relaxing afternoon? no. Could it all have been avoided? yes.

At least I can sweep this under the rug of 2008 and swear it off for ’09, ya?

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