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The night time is the right time

August 3, 2005

Ok so the horniest bug alive lives outside my living room window (and no, it’s not Buggie). Every night around 9pm he starts his mating song. That is if a song sounds like: bzbzzzzzzz! ?? bzbzzzzzzz! ?? bzbzzzzzzz!?? It goes on for hours on end (large/bold font used to emphasize the loudness of Horny Bug’s dating game). Dude! Give it a rest already. Girls don’t go for the loud-desperate type, not even ugly cricket girls. I mean, Horny Bug must be pretty unfortunate looking since it never seems like he’s getting any. I hear little stops in the buzzing, but cricket sex can’t be that short, so that has got to be when he’s getting turned down or something. I imagine him to be like that over anxious guy who talks too loud and stands too close and gestures too wildly and who will approach anything resembling a female.

I mean, I am a girl that likes to be pursued, but c’mon! I am not your kind! Take off ya hoser!

4 Comments leave one →
  1. August 4, 2005 7:14 am

    You don’t suppose that bug thinks you have a nice hiney and quite litterally wants to be on it?

  2. August 4, 2005 10:25 am

    Somebuggie got some! Well he either got some cricket lovin’ OR he realized the cricket chicks weren’t diggin’ on his vibe and he moved on to the next bush…cuz, baby, it was quiet last night!

  3. August 4, 2005 11:26 am

    Maybe he was roasted, canned and autctioned on ebay.

  4. August 5, 2005 10:38 am

    Nope, not fried, canned, nor fricasseed. He’s moved to the bushes outside the bathroom. I heard him last night as I washed my face. Poor bug bastard.

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