Aiyaiyai

I want her body.

(AP Photo/Mark J. Terrill)

That is all.

Crazy, is that you?

You are not that girl. You do not suffer from crazy-girl psyscosis. Ok maybe sometimes you are that girl. You are not perfect. But you should have faith. Don’t ruin shit before it happens or doesn’t happen. Don’t be an ass. Really, don’t be an ass. Ok, only be an ass when it’s funny (for other people and not just you). Hold off with the flippant attitude, OK? You are going to learn a lot in a week if you play your cards right, you need to go in with an open mind and an open heart.

This has been a Baby Bananas Self Help Announcement.

Oh God! What to do now?

So, yeah, remember when date #3 happened? Well, now I am past a very lovely “date” #4…

…and he’s still calling.

[twiddling my thumbs]

Three and out?

It is a documented fact that I don’t do well after the third date. (And you all thought this was going to be about baseball.) By “well” I mean go on a fourth date. Girlriends and guy friends alike are equally perplexed as to this phenomenon in my dating life. All things kind of come to a screeching halt shortly after date number three. Sometimes without fanfare (she strikes out looking!) and sometimes with, well a tiny bit anyway. It doesn’t seem to matter how much time elapsed from start to finish—1 week, 3 weeks, 6 weeks. Date #3 = Done. Over. No mas.

Did my fairy godmother instill a three and out rule, and allow prospective boyfriends an insight to my inner pumpkin after they wooed me just long enough? This is what you are really getting into, take a good look. Are you prepared for all of this young man? If not, get out while you can. In fact, just go…no worries…it really is too much for you.

I wish I had an answer. Because if staying up all night in your pjs, watching Sports Center and arguing baseball while drinking Hoegaarden counts as date, I just might be in trouble. And I can honestly say I am not ready to head back to the dugout on this one just yet.

More sighing

Me (to Cubs Fan): WSH 5 / HOU 1 — I told you the Nationals missed me! They were hitting like crazy last night, granted it wasn’t until the 8th and only then after a favorable balk in the 6th. But still, they were fired up. I credit myself with the win. Now if I could only get myself to Minneapolis to help out the Twins.

In more important news, you think the Oilers will sweep? How cool would that be?

Cubs Fan: Love to see Buffalo against the Oilers…awesome. Good job with the Nats at RFK.

You do really miss me huh? It is my tallness and wit? Do say…

Me: Aw, I do miss ya. It’s the smile mostly. The wit I can get over email
I want to see the Sabres and the Oilers too! I can’t root for Buffalo to win the Cup though. They took the Sens out and Ottawa was my fav going into the playoffs.

Cubs Fan: I’m pulling for rough Buff.

Me: No way! Care to wager? Trying to think of something good to play for…

Cubs Fan: I know…I know!!!

Me: Your enthusiasm scares me, but my curiosity is piqued…Whatcha got?

Cubs Fan: It won’t get past my email filter

Am I so easy that this makes all blushy? And how much do I hate that he lives in Chicago? But how much do I love the flirt? Been some good solid months since I had good flirt. Nice to have it back.

Sigh and double sigh.

Sigh

I heart email flirting.

Me (to Cubs Fan): Two shut outs aren’t enough, now you have to add insult to injury by
having Wood close out the series? Not fair.*

Cubs Fan: I will drink a bud for you at Wrigley.

Me: Will you get peanuts, too? Beer and peanuts! You know, I’ve only been
to one [Nats] game this season so far. Pathetic. That’s why they are
sucking so hard. They miss me.

Cubs Fan: 2 dogs with onions…two beers and a bag of peanuts…every game. I have
been to 10 games this year I miss you too.

Me: You just had to go and rub it in about your game attendance and hotdog
rituals and then say something all nice and stuff. When you gonna come out
here for a game?

And then we segue into real flirting, black lace may or may not have been mentioned. But is he coming out here? No. Not at this time. He tried though.

Sigh.

*Turned out to be fair enough. Cubs Fan called it (in a not-quoted-here email)–Wood got shelled, 4 runs in five innings. Final score WSH 5/CHC 3.

Do you like Pina Colada?

I don’t, but I do like the idea of sipping a frosty beverage on the beach, which is exactly what I was doing approximately 36 hours ago. Wow, if you ever have the chance to head to Marco Island, Florida, go! It’s beautiful. Much nicer than the Atlantic coast of Florida. I am trying to get the picture I took of the sunset I saw on Friday evening, but blogger is being a butt. The crazy thing is, Thursday’s sunset was even better than the one I have a pic of. I was only gone 3.5 days (and it was for work) but I almost feel as if I had a mini-vacation. Nice spot. I fully recommend it to those who like to laze.

Coming up this week:

~Bikram yoga classes and some good lifting, since I neglected both last week
~Belated birthday lunch with a friend
~Finally getting back to the track with the running club (after a month away, eek!)
~Dental appointment (oh, joy)
~Cancelled dinner date with Google Dater (I cancelled based on non-communication, but he left a message yesterday and it may or may not be back on. We’ll see.)
~Girls-only lunch for a new little woman, who’s all of 11 years old.
~Superbowl XL. Let’s go Seahawks! Am I a retard ? Because I would really like a tee-shirt that says “SuperBowl XL” written in that locker room/high-school sports font.

Calling all advice givers and doubt quellers

Alright, I am self-admittedly no freaking good at this. “This” being dating. So I am opening myself up to advice. Ack! Yay? Yay. Aside from it being well established that I have a broken Flirt-O-Meter, I am also prone to over-analyzation. What girl isn’t, right? I have three dates under my belt with Google Dater with a fourth one scheduled for next month. Yes, I said next month. It has seemed, from the start, that our schedules are not very conducive together and now as we approach a month of contact, the damn over-thinking girl crap has set in. Anyway this has been what is going on this past month:

~Google Dater, well Googles, and emails me on a Monday before the Christmas holiday
~We set a date for later in the week.
~There are many emails and a phone conversation in between
RESULT: Date # 1 is excellent and we make a specific plans for the next date

Christmas Break happens, he’s on travel, then I’m on travel, then he’s on travel again. This mean it’s two weeks before our next date. But….

~There was lots of texting during our respective travels
~And more than the occasional phone conversation, we’re not talking everyday here…but in the two weeks there were a *few* calls. (Is this where I say I am not a huge fan of chatting on the phone? My phone philosophy is generally, say what you need to say and bid each other goodbye. Some good talk and/or flirting can trump this reaction though…so “more than a few phone calls is saying a lot here.)
~He flies in from his travels and drives directly from the airport to my office to pick me up for Date #2 (swoon)
RESULT: Date #2 is excellent, and we talk about what might happen for the next time

Two days later he is traveling again, mini-vaca style.

~There is texting while he’s away but then he returns and there is a lull. I initiate a text which results in a nice phone conversation later that evening. We make plans for when he returns, from yet another trip. This time it’s business though.

~No contact for 4 days (he’s away and busy, I’m just busy).
~He’s on a red-eye from Vegas and calls me after he’s back and has had a little nap, we solidify our plans for later that day.
~He comes to pick me up, we go out.
~We make mention that there will be a 4th date.
~Even though it’s not a “school-night”, the evening ends early.
RESULT: Date #3, is ok. It ends a little too early for me, but he had just flown in from Vegas so I should not take this personally, right?

So now he’s in town, and it had been a couple of days so I emailed him this past Wednesday. He apologizes for not calling, says he is glad to hear from me and things are crazy at work. I tell him to give me a couple days that are good for him and I’ll figure out Date #4. He basically says the next two Wednesdays are good (?!?! Wednesday?!?!). Well, I am traveling as of next Wednesday, so that’s out. I picked the following Thursday. He says it works for him and that is that.

So, again, 2 weeks between dates! Ok, he’s a very busy guy (which I get because my job does that to me too) but he was all super happy to email and text early on and now nothing. Is he just busy or losing interest? With the distance between communication and face-to-face contact I fear I might be losing interest too. But I don’t want to fuck it up by thinking he’s not interested when he’s just busy….waaa….

Wicked awesome

as in, things that are Wicked Awesome (in no particular order)

*12-day vacation from work
What’s Not Wicked Awesome (WNWA)? Coming back and trying to figure out what in the hell you are and/or were doing before you left

*portable music (hear the angel’s singing)
WNWA? Not having a computer at home to charge the damn thing. I know! I know, buy a friggin adapter already. Yeah, see next item

*2 FULL days of squeal-worthy shopping with your best friend in Chicago. Case in point: A $138 blazer from Anthropologie for $31.20 including Chicago’s outrageous 9% sales tax!
WNWA? The ensuing credit card burn. Don’t hate me MaterCard! Er, I guess you love me. Whatevs. Small monthly payments?

*A free airline ticket (thank you United air miles!) and a free place to stay in Chicago that just happened to be STUMBLING distance from many favourite haunts. Including, but not limited to Bistro Zinc, Melvin B’s, Prada, Starbuck’s, Michigan Ave., and The Lodge.
WNWA? Not being able to find the favorite beer of the owner of said free place, so we could stock his fridge with it

*Every single person in Chicago – seriously so great. Everyone was so great!
WNWA? Even the dorks in Chicago were nice, but still dorky. I mean, c’mon…you’re telling me there was only one cute boy in the windy city last week?

*speaking of cute boys…..New Year’s Eve kisses. Yum.
WNWA? Having Google Dater quiz you like a girlfriend to see if he can find out where your lips have been in between dates

*A clean living environment ~ the two extra days I had off after the New Year were spent tidying and scrubbing. All rooms at Condo-Marci are clean as a whistle.
WNWA? Um, cleaning sucks

*Wicked. As in the musical. You know, the sold-out performance at the Kennedy Center? Yeah. I went. Last night. On my second date with Google Dater. Sigh.
WNWA? Nothing. Nothing at all.

I Google, therefore I date?

So I was Googled, found and subsequently asked out on a date. I am not freaked out, I am flattered and I am going. How do you like them apples?

In our conversing, Google Dater brought up an interesting question. He asked simply, “Did you realize that I was into you [on either of the two occasions we had met]?”. Honestly? No, I hadn’t. He claimed he was flirting unmercifully. Hmm. I had just chalked it up to friendly banter. Now, I admit that I am generally an idiot about such things, but how much flirt potential am I missing out on here? Are there gaggles of potential Google suitors? All kidding aside, is my Flirt-O-Meter broken? If so, how do I fix it?